...irretrievably broken...

...those are the words on the dissolution (isn't that a nicer word than divorce?!) paperwork.

I guess now is the time to let you all know that I filed the divorce papers with the court this morning. It will be finalized April 15th. My reasons and the full circumstances of the last couple of years shall remain mine, but I can say that this was a decision not made lightly, or out of anger, and that I really prayed about it.

I asked God for some really clear guidance. It came, of course, in a way that I had not expected. That's usually what happens. Neon signs are good for those of us who are slow learners or who are sometimes oblivious to things.

My emotions are a little weird right now: I'm experiencing sadness over the fact that these things should have been worked out before they went too far; the feeling that I have somehow failed; and over wasted time. But I also am feeling that sense of relief, of renewal, and of hope that comes when a weight is lifted off of your shoulders.

You probably won't hear too much more from me on the subject. Many things are just too personal to put out on the internet, and really don't serve any purpose. I am thankful for the love and encouragement of my friends, for the scriptures that have been sent to me, and for the continued prayers and support.

And I promise to return to my deep and well thought out blog postings more often... :)